Thank God it's Monday

Renounce violence. Disparage ignorance. Reject intolerance. BUT DON'T HATE MONDAY. It's step one on the road to Elsewhere.

I woke up this morning all excited. It was Monday, again! My favorite day of the week to start something! To get things done! To put an end to disappointing NFL results!

In my first waking moments, I quickly assembled nine great reasons to love Mondays. (Plus one note of caution….)

1. Monday is named for Mani, the Norse god of the moon. A big Norse cheer for her special day!

1. Monday is an anagram for dynamo! And other nonsense!

   

2. You wanna start something punk? Do you? Mondays are great for that! And for a punch in the nose!

   

3. Monday has a classic song! The Rolling Stones released “Start Me Up” on August 14, 1981. It was a Friday, alas. But that’s when they promised to “never stop,” and defying all odds and actuarial tables, they haven’t. (Except Charlie Watts, R.I.P.)

1. There’s almost a famous restaurant chain named for it! Join me for Signature Whisky Glazed Chicken Strips™ at Thank God it’s Friday Monday!

It’s not as popular as it should be.

1. The Titanic sank on Monday, April 15, 1912, killing 1,500 people. Actually, that’s sad. But what a great movie it made! Especially that one scene, which inspired me to take up drawing.

1. Monday is the #1 day for online shopping, perhaps a passive-aggressive move by employees against their employers, for chaining them to their computers again after a delightful weekend. Looking to buy something? I have an idea!*

1. Mondays are the most likely day for the stock market to rise!

Unless of course it suffers a nervous-making drop like it did on Black Monday in October 1929, and touches off the Great Depression the next day.

1. Monday is the least rainy day of the week, perhaps because the absence of weekend commuters leads to less pollution, and less particulate matter to seed rainclouds.

   

   Is it hot on this planet, or is it just me?

OH, WAIT.

Today is actually Monday the 13th! Better hold off starting anything important until tomorrow.

Or, next Monday!

*The “buy me a coffee” tab is a real thing, launched by the BMAC team help you support the creator economy one creator at a time, five bucks at a time. Like me for instance. I CREATE this thrice-weekly column free of charge, with a mind toward making it pay off through subscriptions (eventually), or by selling the book I’m excerpting here on Fridays (some day), or by having you buy me a metaphorical cup o’ joe right this instant.

Monday is a perfect day to do that, in fact!