The Whitest Thing I Do

Taking the high road to racism, in the Rockies

There’s this new show that just showed up on Netflix. It’s called Seinfeld.

Wait, it’s not new?

I guess I was otherwise occupied raising a family and earning a living between 1989 and 1998, when the show aired, and aired, and aired. Now I have 180 episodes to enjoy, which should get me through the extended pandemic and then some.

In season 2, episode 3, a suitably “nothing” plot unfolds when Jerry spends a lot of money on a very 90s suede jacket. It looks great on the outside, but has a pink-striped lining. For the next twenty-two minutes, the lining surges to the fore in a number of incidents. Hilarity ensues.

But while I was laughing, I was also thinking: That pink-striped lining has quite a bit to teach us about race in these supposedly post-racial times.

Block that metaphor, right? But hang with me for a sec.

Earlier this summer I had an assignment from Backpacker magazine, to write about stupid things white people say to people of color when they encounter them in the wilderness. I…