And Not a Drop to Drink
Taking a vow of abstinence from alcohol? These cranky cocktails should take all the fun out of it. WRITTEN & ILLUSTRATED by PETER MOORE (Hic!)
I THOUGHT ABOUT TRYING OUT “DRY JANUARY.” But really, during the coldest and darkest month of the year? That’s when I’ll quit alcohol? It’s like quitting scratching during mosquito season.
But the health benefits of quitting are beyond dispute. So, take off your beer goggles and consider the concoctions below, which I have graciously mixed up to curtail the drink-drank-drunk continuum.
Maybe you should go cold turkey, least while you’re reading this?
You don’t want to spill a Dark ‘n Stormy on your keyboard.
And now, bottoms up. Or better yet, not.
The Scuby-don’t.
The Primordial Soup.
The “Pissing in the Pool”-tail.
The Big Chill.
The Octo-Colada.
Did you try a Dry January? What happened in February? Leave a note in the comments, to help me tweak my own sipping strategies.
Seems like I’m thinking about drinking, a lot. It must be my anxiety over maintaining a healthy subscriber base.
Looking to find more great newsletters, where you (probably) found this one? Click this link! You get cool things to read, I get cold hard cash from the guy who runs the Refind.com. Everybody wins!
Great to be with all 12,000 of you here on the Road2Elsewhere. It’s one Road that it’s safe to drink on, as long as you don’t read behind the wheel.
I became a professional level drinker at the age of twelve. But one year ago, after a decidedly wet January, I had a chat with my FP who informed me my A1C had reached a nice fat round number. At that moment I decided to push back from the bar, lost thirty pounds, and discovered the joy of Kombucha (yes, it is fermented, but at .5 percent alcohol it’s a better option than Hendricks). Very quickly I felt like Superman and have no plans to exercise the elbow again.
No recipes, dude?