A Royal Pain in the Arts

Want trouble? Paint a portrait of Britain's Royal Family. And I'm here to help! WRITTEN & ILLUSTRATED by PETER MOORE

THE NEW PORTRAIT OF KING CHARLES, by the artist Jonathan Yeo, inspired rage among the monarch’s rabid fans. It was big news, because nobody knew that King Charles had any fans at all.

Note the butterfly over his right shoulder. This will be important later.

I have a ton of sympathy for my fellow artists.

It’s not easy to please the many close followers of the Royals. Just ask the Royals! Add Charles’s open-car-door ears, and his antipathy for anything “modern,” and you have an artistic challenge that would have turned Picasso cross-eyed!